Not Firing on all Cylinders

Last week as I drove toward my house, I stopped for gas.  I quickly filled the tank and started the car.  It began to sputter.  The engine sounded like it was coughing.  I gave it gas to keep it from stalling.  I thought about leaving the car here and getting it towed to my house, but decided I could probably make it home.  As long as I kept the engine revving higher than normal, I was able to drive it home.  However, it was not the smooth ride I am used to in my car.  The car shook and jerked while I slowly drove home.  I’m sure I used a lot more gas than normal despite driving below the speed limit.  

I figured the car was in the automotive ICU.  I spent the weekend browsing websites for possible replacements in the event my car was not worth fixing.  Last night my brother-in-law took a look at the car and was able to diagnose the problem in less than 10 seconds.  A vacuum hose had come loose and needed to be put back in place.  He mentioned the car had not been firing on all cylinders.  He guessed as much as half the engine was misfiring.  When I started the car again, it still sputtered and coughed for a short while.  A great cloud of smoke came out of the exhaust.  Soon the shaking slowed and stopped.  The engine went back to its normal manner of operating.  

The car is running fine.  Earlier tonight I tightened a clamp on the hose and took it for a test drive.  Everything worked perfectly.  This experience with my car got me thinking about how we need others in our lives to point out the problems they see.  I knew I had a problem with my car, but I could not see it (or fix it).  I needed the perspective of my brother-in-law to show me the problem and help me fix it.  

In a similar way Christians should be speaking the truth in love to one another.  God has called us to live in community.  That involves caring about one another enough to speak up when we see someone making decisions that in the long run will damage themselves, relationships with others, and their relationship with God (adapted from a sermon by Todd Wagner of Watermark).  

I wonder, how many divorces could have been prevented if the Christians around the couple had simply spoken up?  How many men would be better fathers if the guys at church had given them a different perspective to think about?  How many women would avoid gossip if a trusted friend cared enough to speak up and gently point out the sin?  How many churches would do better at pleasing God if the pastor confronted the sin in his own life and the lives of his congregation?

My wife is good at this.  She often points out areas in my life where improvement is needed.  She carefully thinks about the words she want to say.  She gives me her perspective.   She gives me a few suggestions on how to fix the problem.  And she gives me time to process her viewpoint.  No one enjoys being confronted about the sin and mistakes he is making.  No one relishes the difficult conversations.  But in the end it is well worth it.  Relationships are restored and people’s lives are once again “firing on all cylinders”.  As with my car, the process of restoration takes time.  It may take time for all the “smoke” to clear.  It will take time for the relationship to go back to its normal manner of operating.  

I challenge us all to speak up.  Lets care about each other so much that we are willing to have the tough conversations.  If you’re not sure how to start the conversation, just tell the person that you care about them and you have noticed that he/she is “not firing on all cylinders”.